sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
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