apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
