i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
