honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
