Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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