Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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