ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
