I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
