i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
is wine microwaveable?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
