Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The Olympian is in my bed
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