Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize