Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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