You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize