I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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