He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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