dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
