Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize