Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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