You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
