I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
