you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
