How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
