Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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