I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
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