shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
