therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
