I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
