Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He better not be in your backpack
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I am available for nakedness
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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