Are we in a gay sports bar?
one two three fourrrrnication!
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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