how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
