New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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