Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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