Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
