im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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