Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
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