I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
3pm strippers are depressing
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
