I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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