Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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