He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize