Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
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