It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
