ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
