he puts the penis in happiness.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
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