If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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