she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
