My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
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