just come out here and I will go home with you...
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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