You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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