im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
