Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize